The first one said: "Well, my father runs the fastest. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. " The salesman said, "Well, can I see him please?" Johnny snickered and said, "No, he is in the shower. Little Johnny: “What good would that have done? My aim is much better than yours. Johnny said, "Yes. Post not marked as liked. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. 3k Views. Posted October 3, 2005. 08 % from 226 votes. We did our best to bring you only the best ones. Teacher: “class we will be learning how to write without lifting your pencil off the paper!”. Net:Miscellaneous Jokes. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One. And, it seems that no matter what shenanigans the young man says, this proud pop always catches the giggle bug. ”. Little Johnny is back. In school there was a fella named Dirty Johnny. Little Johnny Jokes Fascinate. Brace yourself for a delightful. Go outside and play. Four plus four, that son of a b*tch is eight. He was a. ”. He got shot down, and had to jump from his plane with his parachute. " Today, from Little Johnny’s Jokes & Puns Dictionary, here we bring you 99 Best Hilarious Little Johnny Dirty jokes to make you excessively laugh until tears start falling from your eyes. #dadjokes #minnesota #winona #kickasslife. ”. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. Grandma and the fuzz #minnesota #winona #kickasslife. “Why have you only got one glove?” she asked. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Get link for other Social Networks. Mother: “Johnny, how far have you gotten with your work?” Little Johnny: “Well, about six miles. More jokes about: little Johnny. " "Then you haven't seen this one," Johnny replies, holding up his right hand. "Now, class. "Johnny, you need to clean up for dinner," his mother says, looking at his left hand. God replied, ”So men would love them. Discover videos related to Little Johnny Jokes on TikTok. " Posted by Jose Mathew at 9:20 AM Labels: Best Jokes - Children Jokes , Best Jokes - Family JokesLittle Johnny is Asked About Jesus. Furious, the teacher sends little Johnny to the principal. Little Johnny's class is reviewing the alphabet. A few minutes later, Johnny saw the man running down the street. Little Johnny took out a net and started scooping them up. Joke has 83. Dominick's jokes usually start with "Hey Dad, wanna hear a joke?" which is met with "Yeah, I wanna hear a joke!" from his father. 7. The first was in 2013 and was called Little Johnny. Joke has 82. The teacher asked little Johnny to use the word "definitely" in a sentence. . Rate: Dislike Like. 9. Little Johnny ice cream jokes. Moral Of The Story. 2 Jokes from National Lampoons Dirty MovieHave U Heard About Little Johnny? He Gets up to all sorts of strife The Little scamp . Little Johnny gets a loan. He’s similar to “Little Johnny”, subject of many hilarious jokes in English. After they've finished having sex they call him inside and ask him " So how many red cars did you see?", Johnny says " I didn't see any red cars but i found. The Little Johnny jokes are passed around in this movie so much that it just makes you laugh until. Little Johnny’ immediately raised his hand, but the teacher certainly didn’t want to call on him! The teacher waited but no other students raised their hands, so she reluctantly called on Little Johnny who replied: “I think the guy said: “Well fuck me! A talking pig!”. . 38. "Keep looking!" Another minute went by, and Johnny called out for a third time: "Mister and Missus Johnson are having sex!" Johnny's parents abruptly stopped in their own activity. ”. because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. Four plus four, that son of a b*tch is eight. They both decided it. Guy walks into a bar Sits at the bar and orders a drink. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned. God is watching. Little Johnny's Chemistry teacher wanted to teach his class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he set up an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass. She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. His teacher said, “That’s such a beautiful answer because it’s calm and peaceful. " "Then you haven't seen this one," Johnny replies, holding up his right hand. One day his teacher says, "Okay class, I want to hear a story from your life, and you're going to tell me the moral of that story. " Little Johnny: "Uhm, uh. Little Johnny came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. “Well, Miss,” explained Little Johnny, “I was watching the weather forecast on TV last night, and it said it was going to be quite sunny but on the other hand it could get quite. "It's a plum miss," said a girl. Johnny screams. Little Johnny jokes have been around for decades, passed down from generation to generation and from friend to friend but the origins of these jokes has been a mystery, until now…. Little Johnny Jokes; Light Bulbs; Light Bulbs Because her student's were getting bored with show and tell, the teacher decided to have the children come to the front of the class to tell of any unusual hobbies their parents had. #littlejohnnyjokes #oldjokes #jokes #funny #minnesota #winona #kickasslife #hilarious #comedy. If you are looking for something to make you laugh, this is the book for you!Joke #3687. Little Johnny Jokes. ” 4. - Little Johnny jokes have been around for decades, passed down from generation to generation and from friend to frie. The teacher says the word is "contagious". The cop looked at the bike and while handing the boy a $20 ticket he said. ”. A Clean Getaway. 0. Little Johnny replied ” De feet of de duck went over de fence before de tail. The teacher hesitated. You're so poor that you go to the rubbish dump with your grocery list. Pelosi if she would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy. When Susie comes home from school she asks her mother why Timmy gave her money. He smiles and says to himself, “I’m a good citizen. Little Johnny gets a loan. . Little Johnny: Can I have a puff, grandpa? Grandpa: can your dick touch your asshole? Little Johnny: Not yet, sir. . Joke #4814. To stay alive? CPR. Johnny was in the playground with his friend Jimmy, when he. He yelled, "Teacher, Teacher, I have to go pee pee!"Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. 😂 DIRTY JOKES! - Little Johnny makes a bet with his teacher | FUNNY JOKEThe joke:A father was very upset about his son Little Johnny's gambling habits. – Your lawyer picks the jury by playing “duck-duck-goose. "Johnny," she said. One day in class the teacher is doing a thing we’re the kids raise their hands to tell a story and then say what the moral is of that story. See TOP 10 little Johnny jokes from collection of 238 jokes rated by visitors. Another funny joke posted by 365Dao, originally seen on Reddit. Funny Little Johnny Jokes that are a Little Dirty is a selection of jokes about the funniest kid in class, Little Johnny. Little Johnny once again immediately raises his hand and says "oh, oh, please pick me" so the teacher thinks for a moment and inside her head knows he'll say "bitch" or "bastard", so she skips over Little Johnny and calls on Little Brad and Little Brad replies "boat. . The preschool teacher says, "We're going to do vocabulary today. Yeah I can reconcile being depressed real bad. Best "little Johnny" joke ever. ”. " Little Johnny's teacher asks him to make a sentence using the following words: defeat, deduct, defense and detail. His full name is known to cause problems with some computers. Little Johnny Jones is a musical by George M. Then the candy store owner's daughter handed the teacher a gift. Teacher: "Johnny, if there are five birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one, how many birds are left?" Little Johnny: "None, teacher. Riddle: How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet? Answer: There is no dirt because it is a hole. Little Johnny was in class and his school teacher wrote a sentence on the board. He was walking to his fathers house with his wagon behind him, when he came to this hill. . When the teacher asks for a word beginning with "A," Little Johnny raises his hand. Susie and Timmy are walking to school together when they pass by a tree. More jokes about: beauty, communication, marriage, mean, money. Jokes. A pianist scored an interview at a local restaurant. When he enters the reception area he notics the lady at the front desk is not around. Little Johnny walks a cow through the village square. The teacher asked little Johnny why he has decided to be different . Little Johnny's father said, "Johnny, we have a $80,000 mortgage on the house, and you want me to buy you a bicycle??? Wait until Christmas!" Christmas came around, and Little Johnny asked again. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. First little Johnny joke i ever heard. . Little Johnny's next door neighbor had a baby. This joke may contain profanity. has an "r" after the first letter. This Joke Already Won! Teacher: "Now Johnny, can you tell me some of your favorite numbers?" Little Johnny: "541, 29, 623, 188, 769 and 40. Johnny says, “Oh wow, I see why they threw him out. ”. When you say my name class remember it. Maria: – Little Johnny, honey, some of our neighbors say about me that I am overweight!On the Bus Little Johnny says, "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady. The teacher asked Sally who our Lord and savior was. It is a shame that Ivanka is Trump's daughter, otherwise he could date her. 320. it from biting again. Dominick's jokes usually start with "Hey Dad, wanna hear a joke?" which is met with "Yeah, I wanna hear a joke!" from his father. Next – 25 Little Johnny Jokes. SHARES. The mayor is shocked, “Surely your father had better be doing that?”. He walks to his friend LJ: "Hey, are you okay? What's wrong?" Girl: "LITTLE JOHNNY! You have to help me!. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. The teacher ignored Little Johnny's eagerly raised hand again as a boy said, "It's an Iguana miss!" "No, it's a kiwi, but i like the way you think Billy. So to get him out of the house they tell him to go to the balcony and count the number of red cars on the road, Johnny says sure and goes out. She asks the class to use a word in a sentence. 3 You have a rag for a gas cap. . Joke: Little Johnny Learns About Heaven These jokes are either very rude or quite gross. answered his mother. Joke #3500. Johnny runs away, screaming. A teacher gives her kids an assignment. "Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods. A Senator at a Primary School. —–. I know a great joke about Corona Virus, you probably won't get it though. Related: Hilarious Deez Nuts Jokes. A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. "I drew a box on the ground!"It's yellow, and soft. 10. 198. Teacher thinks, no way, he's just going to say a**hole and picks another student. Please feel fr. The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers yet. . Little Johnny: One plus six, that son of a b*tch is seven. He opens the door to his parents room and sees mom, handcuffed to the bed's headboard, dad ramming her from behind. You are so poor that Nigerian princes send you money. what is it?” she asked. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. 186. Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him: "Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of $100,000, and you gave her $50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?" Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? $50,000 more. Little Johnny was in Science class and his teacher wanted to do an experiment. Little Johnny Jokes - Teacher Asks Little Johnny To Use The Word Definitely. I hope you enjoyed them! 47. Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. They had brought along bananas for lunch. He was always a trouble maker the teachers never liked him. Misc Jokes. Little Johnny Jokes - Little Johnny And The Science Experiment. He is sent to the manager and is asked to play a few songs from memory. "Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. "Joke #13424. ”. 1. Johnny poked her in the butt again and Sally screamed "oh my god!" And fell back to sleep. Little Johnny walks into his parent's room one night to find them having sex. When they arrived home from the hospital, the parents invited Little Johnny's family to come over and see their new baby. Little Johnny walks in on his parents doing it and his father plays it off by pretending to look under the bed. Little Johnny and Baseball. Little Johnny: "Because I heard it was a piece of cake!" 7. It was fascinating. 39. The teacher asked why George Washington’s father. Download. ” 3. The pianist says - “this is one of my favourites. Oh, and a Czech one too. First day he sent Jimmy with some chickens. " The "Yankee Doodle" character was inspired by real-life Hall of Fame jockey Tod Sloan . She starts to talk sternly to Little Johnny and says "Johnny when I was a young girl I was told that if I made ugly faces and the wind changed, my face would stay that way. ”. And he helped by laying on the top of the eel. ” Santa Clause wrote him back, “Ok, send me your mother. These jokes often tackle sexual issues and are often considered inappropriate by grown-ups. “That’s nice. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. This Joke Already Won! Why did Little Johnny start each day gluing coins to the back of his shirts and stretching to touch his toes? Because he was going out for the football team, and he wanted to be the quarter-back! But why the stretching?Little Johnny Jones. . " Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth. Little Johnny rushes home from school. The funniest little Johnny jokes only! Page 22. Johnny answered. Little Johnny: “Don’t worry, teacher, I don’t eat pork. " The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word "fascinate. Well, Speaking of little Johnny heres another one of his jokes! one day, little jonny asked his mom what sex was. The teacher sat down. "Mommy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's. Welcome to my page, the official page of Jeremy Littel. One day little Johnny comes home one day from school and his mom asks him how his day was. “an apple” replied little Raymond “no,” said the teacher ” it’s a tomato but it shows your thinking. Little Johnny’s teacher asks the class, “What is the difference between a duck?”. Office Jokes. Johnny woke up again and exclaimed, "Mary mother of God!" "Correct," said the teacher once more. Little Johnny was sitting in class one day and he really needed to go to the bathroom. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate', so she called on him. Joke #3163. hahaha, clean, hilarious. “Yes it is. Little Johnny's teacher is doing her rounds at lunchtime when she sees little Johnny pulling faces at another child. He opens the door to his parents room and sees mom, handcuffed to the bed's headboard, dad ramming her from behind. "Oh, Dad," Little Johnny sobs, "first, there was no Santa Claus. Johnny then fell back asleep. 🤔. ‘Little Johnny The Movie’ celebrates the wrongest jokes ever told. . Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad's farm and we all saw his pet sheep. His friend: “And where is your brother?”. '. Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Please watch: "The Truth About 1000 Subscriber Earnings" --~--The latest in the Laughaholics series is all about. " One little boy stands up and offers that, "If my best friend. So I stole a bike, then asked for forgiveness. 3K shares, Facebook Reels from Bebahan: "LITTLE JOHNNYS NEIGHBOUR" #jokes #funny #memes #jokeoftheday #lol #laugh #twitch. littel_johnny. 75+ Dirty Jokes That Are Never Appropriate But Always Funny in 2023. One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asks his mum where babies come from. Little Johnny: “I is…”. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. Redneck Jokes Christmas Jokes Anti Jokes Skeleton Jokes. So a girl raises her hand. Little Johnny Jokes - Little Johnny And His Teacher In Class At School. Net:Miscellaneous Jokes. So our illustrious Democrat asked the class for an example. During a lesson little Johnny yawns extremely wide. In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a "tragedy. Her face turns bright red and she yells "JOHNNY FUCKER FASTER. Five year old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!" The policeman said, "What's he like?" Little Johnny replied, "Beer and women!" Vote: share joke. 2 You own a homemade fur coat. Best Jokes of the Day | Dirty Jokes | 18+ Jokes | Little Johny Jokes | Joke 13You're so poor that when you were kicking a can down the street the other day a stranger asked if you were moving. Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. and cried. 41. Little Johnny was in the. – Your lawyer picks the jury by playing “duck-duck-goose. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said: "Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that. He look and gasps you don't got one of these, but Mary laughs and says Yea, but with one of these I can get as many of those I. #6. " Sally raised her hand. If I get quarantined for two weeks with my wife and I die. – Your lawyer tells you that he has never told a lie. The man then asks, “Then tell me God, why on earth did you make women so dumb?”. Warning signs you might need a different lawyer: – Your lawyer tells you that his last good case was of Budweiser. . Johnny's mother greets him at home, and he tells her, "I know the whole truth. 10. He replies, "Mom, today I had sex with the teacher!" Immediately she was angry. Little Johnny Jokes - Little Johnny Has A Teacher In Class At School Who Wants An Answer. " His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father. Teacher tries to be funny: “Johnny, don’t swallow me. tell the principal and you'll get fired. Joke #6474. Long. Reaching into a box, Little Johnny pulled out a stick of dynamite, lit it, and tossed it into the water. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. Clean family friendly jokes about Little Johnny. . . 5K. Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly. Most are awesome fish jokes but some could qualify as cheesy Dad Jokes. . Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Set Filter Lock Password: Little Johnny. Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could not contain himself as he ran home and started to tell his mother. From our website ️🌟 Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE and SHARE if you laughed! 🌟👇 FOLLOW US ON 👇Facebook says, “I learned that if you keep going around and around, you’ll eventually come back to where you started. The pastor shakes his head, sits down next to Johnny and says, "Now you know that's not true son. Little Johnny wakes up one night hearing noises from his parents bedroom. " The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate', not 'fascinating'. Teacher: “Why are you praying in class little Johnny?” Little Johnny: “My mom taught me to always pray before going to sleep. Share More sharing options. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. ” Teacher: “If 1+ 1 = 2 and 2+ 2 = 4, what is 4+ 4?” Little Johnny: “That’s not fair you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!” I'd tell you a confidence joke but I'm insecure I'd tell a war joke but I'm afraid it would bomb I'd tell an enema joke but you couldn't hold it in I'd tell a flogger joke but it doesn't have much impact. He replied, “My dad always says he’s going to quit smoking, but he never does. The gunshot would scare them all away. " Then Little Johnny says, "give me fifty cents. Johnny didn't forget. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. 11,053Then he says. Little Johnny's neighbour had a baby. Please feel fr. Little Johnny Goes Out for the Football Team. If I get quarantined for two weeks with my wife and I die. "Okay teacher," he said, standing up, "this one's for you!" He stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled it out with his hand closed around it. His boss said, “A customer said you said I was a stupid idiot. Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench, eating six bars of chocolate. You're so poor that when you were kicking a can down the street the other day a stranger asked if you were moving. The mayor sees him and asks, “Hey Johnny, where are you going with the cow?”. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright. Little Johnny is the type of kid who opens the door with a burning cigar in one hand, and an open beer in the other. 5 You’ve ever bought a used cap. ice cream, laughter | 50K views, 418 likes, 14 loves, 10 comments, 417 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Jeremy Littel: LITTLE JOHNNY JOKES ABOUT ICE CREAM, DUCKS, & TROUBLE #funny #laugh. A Clean Getaway. Cohan. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, school, teacher Johny is the first day in jail in the cell with one mighty and a crazy prisoner and this crazy prisoner tells Johny: "You probably do not know that on the first day must every new prisoner must pass over the so-called welcome´s ceremonial. #littlejohnny #funnyjoke #jokesoftheday. Johnny runs away, screaming. Teacher: Make an opposite of this sentence: ‘Kids in the dark usually make errors. 52 % from 222 votes. Little Ralphy raises his hand. At this point little Johnny was frustrated. He stares for a minute and then, thoroughly disgusted, shakes his head, “And these people tell me I shouldn’t pick my nose?!”. Related: Hilarious Deez Nuts Jokes. ” In the world of humor, Little Johnny jokes stand as timeless gems, spanning cultures, generations, and topics. Finally he offered her a nickel if she'll lie down on his bed and she does and he goes to town, so to speak. Please feel f. One day little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking a cigarette and he went up to his grandpa and asked him hey Grandpa can I have a cigarette and his grandpa said well can your dick reach to your asshole and little Johnny replied with no of course not and little Johnny's Grandpa replied with then you're not old enough to smoke a. 80 % from 67 votes. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. . Please feel fr. of a fight. The officer gets back in his car and drives away. Best Jokes of the Day | Dirty Jokes | 18+ Jokes | Little Johny Jokes | Joke 13Little Johnny One-Liner Jokes. That’s ironic. Joke #13424. . More jokes about: baby, little Johnny, sex. What does the pig give you?” Jenny: “The pig gives us ham and pork chops” Teacher: “Yes! What does a cow give you?” Little Johnny: “Homework for tomorrow” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day”. Margo taught it that way to the class. Little Johnny said, “Easy. Bebahan · Original audioMedia. Some of the jokes are priest jokes, nun jokes, bishop jokes and pope jokes. Green lived in two story house together with an elderly widow. " Then Little Johnny says, "give me fifty cents. Little Johnny unwraps a pack of candy and grandpa asks for one. Johnny: No, Maam, your thinking of a blow job, and that is only two syllables. Johnny is a clever little boy with a clean mind! Funny Stories to Tell Your Grandparents Summary: A State Trooper pulls over a car that was driving at 22mph on a highway. -- Funny Little Johny Jokes --Little Johnny was going to his fathers house one day and he was packing everthing in his room and putting it in his little red wagon. A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus". . Little Johnny has always provided the online joke world with much amusement, so I decided to put a little collection of his most outrageous shenanigans together just for you. "I know, teacher! It's a banana! "No, Little Johny," said the teacher, "it's a tennis ball, but I like the way you think. Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--, also known as Little Bobby Tables, is a stick figure character in xkcd. I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her" - USA Today. Little Johnny Jokes. - Scene from Little Johnny the Movie that is based on Little Johnny jokes. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. Table of Contents. I just drive everywhere. 🤔. He yelled, "Teacher, Teacher, I have to go pee pee!" The teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, you should be old enough to know that this is not the proper word to use?" "The correct word would be urinate. . More jokes about: little Johnny, teacher. "Little johnny wakes up one night hearing noises from his parents bedroom. Little Johnny jokes are about a small boy who naively poses questions and makes statements that are very embarrassing to his "grownup" listeners (such as parents and teachers), and has a very straightforward way of thinking. Please feel fr. 95 % from 143 votes.